"I know you are, but what am I!"

I feel like I'm destined to be trapped in that cycle of elementary level thinking.  You would think (or hope) that if you are of the same profession as another, they would respect you and your experience.  I find more often than not, I'm talking to a brick wall (and I was incorrect to assume that my son's previous placement just had teacher's of that caliber).

I could pick it apart and come up with a billion different possibilities as to why this continues to happen.  But in reality, I grow so tired of it being on my mind, and affecting my ability to perform for my students.

Maybe its that I teach Non Public?
Maybe its that I teach the most severely affected in our county?
Maybe its that I have only ten years experience under my belt (which in most situations is more years than those I'm dealing with).
Maybe I'm viewed as a threat?
Maybe its that I'm only viewed as the parent?
Maybe its that I speak up and question multiple aspects; occasionally offering suggestions of what has worked in the home?

Maybe............I'll never have the answer.

When the system fails...........

Just a quick "quip" about my personal experience, and a recent article I just happened upon.

My son's school district is having massive financial issues, and really, this isn't new news if your a resident of this county.  It also isn't surprising, given our current economic climate (or how I like to view it, the toilet).  Tough choices have to be made, no one is going to be happy, and we all have to give up a little; I accept this (though I've been doing that for years, long before the current economic mess).

Were this to be a truly solid educational model, that operated efficiently, and served the students within it well, I would have little to say on the subject; nobody likes change, that's a given.  But since my experience has been one of constant struggles to attain/maintain even basic services, and compliance with IDEA/FAPE (to the extent that my son has made little to no progress in the last five years academically), I find it a very bitter pill to swallow that I should stand for more to be taken away from him.

And then, you top it off with a carefully placed quote saying that risking litigation is acceptable, to reduce services in the special education model further?  A program in which this district is more than often not fully providing in the first place, and the only reason to date there hasn't been more litigation is because of the burden of cost on parents to proceed legally?

Worry not, I'll be standing by "pro pers" should this district proceed to further impact my son's education.  Cost shall not intimidate me from seeking what he is legally entitled to.

Keep up that smug attitude; I guarantee it will come back to bite you in the ass!

Look before you leap; the politics of Special Education

For some time now (most aggressively this last school year), there has occurred some major shake ups with respect to special education here in this county.  In theory, it's supposed to equate to nearly a complete overhaul of the system.  As with any issue where tax payer dollars are involved, there will certainly be political agendas behind it.  While change is often for the greater good, the message conveyed behind why the change is necessary, often gets lost, muddied, or was simply an "excuse" to satisfy the people, and hide the real intention behind it.

Based on a report of analysis of the current educational model here, many suggestions were made, that are in fact very legitimate, and in desperate need of change.  They highlighted the disproportionate amount of special ed. students being segregated to special day classes, separate sites, etc., as well as some huge inaccuracies in particular ethnic groups being labeled as disabled, when in fact those issues stem from social maladjustment. 

These are important key points to look at.  Students need opportunity to be placed in the least restrictive environment and to be educated with their non disabled peers to the maximum extent appropriate.  The other students have the right to be educated with their non disabled peers, and not be subjected to profiling based on their color, where they end up inappropriately labeled as something they are not.

It all sounds fantastic and beneficial in theory.  It's as if someone waved a magic wand, and suddenly the district woke up.  Were it not to coincide with a massive budget gap, and a failing economy, it would seem pure in intention.  Some may say that's just killing two birds with one stone, and you're being to cynical to see the forest through the trees.

Let's examine some of the underlying issues that are prevalent already with the old model, and how they will one, continue to affect the new model, and two, due to the budget, create a massive failure of the new model.

Adequate training.  This is a huge issue in general.  Those classified as special education staff, often lack even rudimentary knowledge in behavioral theory.  They may be sent to a workshop on a particular topic sporadically, but it's often a band-aid at best.  They are not given the opportunity to thoroughly learn the nuances of behavioral theory, and put them into practice.  This isn't just at the parapro level, this is true of the teachers as well.  So, there is a behavior department, which is much more thoroughly trained, has access to creating visuals, and comes out as support to these individuals, to teach them what they weren't given the opportunity to learn.  Once again, sounds great.  Except that within this district there is a growing sense of disdain towards the special ed. population, and the current crop of staff that believe that these students don't have the right to have behavior, or that they as staff, shouldn't have to put up with the level of intensity that some children display.  So the behavior department tries their best to train them, and show them the error of their ways, and give them the tools that will make these students successful, though they are often met with hostility, and refusal by the part of the staff.  They refuse to implement these tools, and ultimately the students suffer.

These are people who are supposed to be best suited to work with the special ed. population, who actively made the choice to work with these students.  They lack the necessary skills, and desire to learn how to help these children.

Now, those issues go mostly unchecked.  The district decides it's going to adopt a new model, and begin mass integrating most of these students back into regular education.  To exposing them to staff that have zero experience or training with this population.  The simplest answer would be to begin training the regular ed. staff prior to the shift, so that these students don't fall by the wayside (or even training them at all).  This is all set up under the guise of providing these students with the least restrictive environment, and trying to be in line with what federal regulations mandate.

But, no such training is taking place.  Add to that, once some students are placed, the request for support can take several months to arrive, meanwhile, once again, the student suffers.  This does not smell of genuine concern to mainstream a child, but rather a means to an end to ease budget woes.  Educating students in special day class, separate facility or even non public settings is extremely costly.  Some non public settings can range between $166 to $235 dollars a day.

Were the district to be actively training and transition planning for this influx of students, this cause would seem genuine.  I find it hard to swallow that this is their actual intention; to provide for the greater good of these students, and not to simply save money.

Even more interesting is that these decisions for this new model come at a time when there is no superintendent, and a blood bath taking place amongst the school board.  Budget cuts,  poor economy, no actual leader, political infighting; very interesting timing indeed.  Change is vital to progress, when the intention is genuinely designed to affect the greater good; not place further constraints on an already broken system.

Maybe I just have a biased opinion from personal experience working in conjunction with this district, and having a child not being served by it adequately.  Maybe I have a skewed view because I have the luxury of intensive training, and staff who genuinely believe in what they do, and are always willing to learn new things. Or maybe, it's just the skeptic in me, that screams this is not what it seems, don't let them pull the wool over your eyes on this issue, while these students get lost in the maze, and will only further regress.

They say patience is a virtue, though I hold little faith that patience will show with time that this move will work out for all, and is a heartfelt sentiment on behalf of the district that is just simply experiencing some growing pains.

My two cents on the subject.

When those in charge of compliance, are ironically out of compliance

The special education system is often like a labyrinth at times, and can create enough frustration, that you almost give up on the whole process.  Opinion and interpretation are at times, not relevant to the regulations or law, which is just one trapping of the system.  I'm okay with that though; it's true of all life situations.  Where the law is clear cut though, is a whole other matter.  There's a system of safeguards in place that are carefully laid out, and the what, why and where of receiving help. 

Cool beans, right?  Well, that is if the people in charge of those safeguards actually adhere to them, or aren't guilty of misconduct themselves.  There's a chain of command for such situations, because unfortunately people fail in their duties at times, and occasionally you have to seek help from someone above them.  But what happens when EVERYBODY in the chain is out of compliance? I mean that is aside from you developing a permanent eye twitch, and wanting to pull your hair out on a regular basis.

My very unfortunate personal example:  First, you discover there are compliance issues with your child's IEP, and you then address that to the principal (check).  Principal admits "Oops" (though it's their oversight to ensure such issues don't occur), but does nothing to correct it.  Next step, you discuss this with your ombudsperson, and file a district level compliance complaint (check).  Meanwhile, about fifteen other compliance issues emerge, so you again, attempt to contact your ombudsperson, to begin the process of filing more compliance complaints (check).  You diligently await your first compliance complaint investigation to be completed, and the resulting investigate report that will contain the corrective action (check).  But you still haven't been able to amend the other fifteen issues that have occurred, because said person never bothers to get back to you, or give you access to the paperwork to file to correct it all.  After a certain period of time, this person is now out of compliance for not getting you either the compliance paperwork, or concluding the compliance investigation, and informing you of the result (check).

Is that ironic?  The person in charge of compliance, can't manage to be in compliance themselves.  What's even more ironic, is that you can't get a hold of the person to determine who you report them to for their failure, because they are the omnipotent power in charge of all issues within the district. 

Meanwhile, your child suffers in this broken system.  And because you do things such as file complaints over legal issues (not your typical "I'm an overprotective parent that can't be satisfied because you didn't wipe his nose 25 times today"), staff begin to view your child unfavorably, and will even go so far as to create behaviors.  They even accidentally send you an email discussing how they are going to willfully be non compliant of the law, because they don't care for your previous actions with regard to filing compliance complaints (and well, if you can't get a hold of the person in charge of these issues, your left talking to thin air).

It's a sad state of affairs.  Like these children don't have enough to face everyday.

It situations like these that makes us such a litigious society.  It's one thing when it's only one link in the chain that is weak; it's another thing when it's the whole entire chain.

Judge not lest ye be judged yourself

Religion aside, it's a simple mantra to live by.  A general "moral" rule of thumb.  Yet, there will always continue to be those people out there who will do exactly that, though fail to see their wrongdoing in the situation.

My unfortunate example of this for the day: Another blogger parent out there with more on his plate than he and his wife deserve, but doing the very best they can.

He is very open and honest about the journey they're on, and how difficult the road can be on even an hourly basis.  He shares the story that far too many of us are familiar with in the struggle to raise special needs children.  For many of us (and I know speaking for myself personally), it's a great inspiration as well as comforting to know that we are not alone in this.

Parenting, is always a hotbed of debate.  Since none of us were issued an instruction manual upon birth, we all have differing views on the specifics of raising a child.  Add to that a special needs child (or in some peoples case, multiple special needs children), and surely, the shit is going to hit the fan at some point.  War's alone could rage over parenting till the end of time.

So recently it seems, some people have chosen to accost him, over the methodology, and just in general, about the way he is fathering his children.  Going as far as to make threats that he is abusive, and the age ol' threat of involving authorities in the matter.


First and foremost, any parent who takes the time to create a blog in reference to their children in attempt to connect with other parents in a similar situation, certainly is well invested in meeting that child's needs.  One does not seek advice, were they to be neglectful, or unconcerned about their children.  This should come as basic common sense although often, common sense is non existent in the general population.  


Secondly, people are allowed to have feelings, and frustrations.  You do not need to agree with them, or approve.  We're human, and it happens to all of us.  No parent has always been a hundred percent chipper all the time.  With that being said, that does not suggest that an individual is abusive, or does not care for their child or children.  We all fall down.


And last but not least, until you've been in this situation yourself, you have no basis to opine, let alone make accusations.  This is where passing judgment eventually is going to come back and bite you in the ass!  You may read the blog and surmise your take on what life is like with special needs children, though that in no way makes you an expert, or gives you the right to suggest abuse.  If there were posts that suggested neglect, abuse, or anything other than genuine concern for the children, then I certainly missed them, and whole slew of other readers.  


I could expound for years on this topic, as I've had the displeasure of being in this situation myself.  Special needs is exactly that, a child who requires things to be done differently.  There is a myriad of modalities from proactive to reactive and everything in between.  Unless you either have a child like this, or your educated to work with the population, you haven't the faintest idea what is right, wrong, or what it takes to raise children like this.  Behavioral theory is a vital component for ALL children to be successful.


And sadly, the end result of people who interfere and make threats is that they diminish the child himself as well as the parents.  You are not seeing the who and what that makes him up and instead passing judgment on what is a legitimate disability, and the caregivers so desperately trying to provide the best care for him.  These are people facing unreasonable odds, and still take the time to try and help others out there faced with the same situation.  How is that abusive?  It's commendable, and you be ashamed for being such a vacuous waste of space in our society.  What good are you providing in general, let alone for these people?

There is a reason one should not judge unless your willing to stand up to scrutiny yourself and prove you are infallible.  Until such time as you can do that, your should just keep your comments to yourself, and let others live their lives with out being exposed to your ignorance.

Do "live" people even exist anymore?

Technology is great, but it seems to come at the expense of not dealing with live people anymore, or any assurance that something you say, actually makes it's way to a real person, with real concern.  As I lamented that I was probably in haste to complain about MTS still not contacting me (though a week doesn't seem all that impatient to me, given what transpired), I just now received my response from them:

"Thank you for taking the time to submit your comments to us. 

It is important for MTS to hear from customers regarding their 

experiences on public transit. 

Please, be assured that the appropriate action will be taken 

concerning the incident you have reported. 

Feel free to contact us in the future regarding your transportation 

needs.
 
 
MTS Customer Relations Department"

If that isn't a standard automated response, then clearly, the extent of 

my complaint fell on deaf ears.

Guess maybe, I set my expectations to high with regard to discrimination 

and prejudice.

Can't wait to run out and purchase that pass for my son to line their pockets!

*End Rant* 

Wishing I could label this "MTS, part deux"...........

But that of course, is not the case.  I should aptly name it "Discrimination ignored as usual" or "Ignorance gets a free pass".  I don't know exactly why Im shocked that my email has been ignored over their ridiculous behavior; or maybe rather it's just akin to rubbing salt in the wound.

Im sure when I email them again about last weeks little excursion, they will no doubt tell me they're overwhelmed with volume, it got lost in the shuffle, blah, blah, and super blah.  Im aware these things happen from time to time, but unless this behavior has become prevalent (and has yet to be exposed), I find it hard to believe that my email didn't stand out against the garden variety other complaints. 

Maybe Im just bitching in haste, and that response will magically appear in my inbox within the next few hours. 

This kind of situation, is just one of the many daily instances that make being a parent of an Autistic child so laborious.  So much of our time is consumed having to advocate, defend, and try to amend others wrong doings.  It really shouldn't have to be this difficult, but I suppose many another disability faced such obstacles in it's infancy before awareness and acceptance were truly is widespread. 

It's exhausting.  It takes away from what we really need to focus on; our children and helping them to navigate this often unkind world.