It's Autism Awareness month..........

April begins the month of spreading the word, and hopefully educating people to what Autism is. It seems odd, given the statistics of what the rate of occurrence currently is, that such a task is even necessary. By now, it should have touched your family, friend, co-worker, an encounter in the grocery store, etc.

Maybe it has, maybe it hasn't; maybe you simply weren't listening.

It is evident in the blog-o-sphere, that it hasn't reached everyone, or that what grasp they have on the disorder is limited, or even biased and misconstrued.

There has recently been some upheaval in the blog world over an individual potentially being unaware of the traits of Autism, and labeling the child she came across as simply "bratty" or "over indulged" by her grandmother. Those of us who have Autism in our life, very clearly assessed the odds that this child was Autistic, and that she was simply misunderstood.

And out came the wolves. Multitudes of individuals praising the writer for her disdain with the child's public behavior, the shared irritation they would have felt with the situation, and the applaud for her "normal" children behaving so well with the experience.

This is where awareness, has gotten us almost no where, and we have so far yet to go.

Some commentary was made from the other side (let's indulge and say "our" side), and explained that this child was most likely Autistic, and the subsequent nuances that come with her behavior. This caused some people who had been rather nasty, to take a step back, and re-examine their position. Yet others, wanted to hear nothing about it. These are the people that no amount of awareness, will change their view. They are of the belief that our children are not "normal" and therefor, should not have the same privileges as their children. This is an unfortunate perception in society, and some will even go on to say that our children are a drain on society, and not worthy of the cost or effort required to help shape them to be as independent and "normal" as possible.

First, there really is no such animal as "normal". There is the kind politically correct phrase of "neurotypical". And just what does that translate into: typical. Typical is average. Typical is vanilla. Typical is being awash in a sea of similarity, with no distinction. Typical, is having nothing special that sets you apart from the rest of the population.

"Normal" or "typical" children (and adults for that matter) run the risk of being a financial burden on our society. In reality, more often than not, it is the "normal" individual that costs us, not vice versa. They cost us in taxpayer dollars for incarceration, in increased taxes from failure to pay debt, in public defenders, drug rehab programs, and more examples than I can list. Some would argue then that these individuals are not normal either but then, who is? That would equate to a very small portion of society. Why are their needs and cost acceptable, and not our affected children?

Secondly, what expertise do such individuals have to determine "normal". Are you certain beyond a shadow a doubt that your own child meets the definition? What happens if down the road your child should be affected mentally or physically? Will they still be "normal" in your eyes (will you lie to yourself because not being "normal" is such a travesty). Or will you turn your back on them because they no longer fit your preconceived bias of how a child should be?

All we can do is attempt to spread the word of awareness and hope for acceptance. Unfortunately, there will be some individuals we'll never get through to.

I'll gladly take my atypical, non-average, more flavorful than vanilla child over your child any day. His uniqueness runs circles around your "normal" child.

End rant.

To blog, or not to blog..............

A question I am asked occasionally, is why do I not blog more?

For me, this is a mixed bag. Some can be attributed to the fact that I lack the time (given what I face in the home, and all the focus and energy that requires). Some is the fact that there is no real privacy on the internet, and information can lead back to you and particular opinion's you express *may* or *may not* affect the view of your child, as well as your professional life. And then simply, there's those pesky naysayers who make it their mission to disagree with everything you say, and add to the upheaval that is already your life.

Add to that, the time already used with the 5,000 social networks, feeds, and other miscellaneous sources being utilized to stay ahead of the game, with respect to what is going on with this particular disorder/methodology/legal logistics, etc.

There is the occupational hazard of being involved in the special education world, and though you say your work will remain at work, you find yourself bringing work home to eat up what precious little free time you may have available.

There are countless hours spent reading, crafting, and drafting emails with regard to your own child's progress, educational program, behavioral intervention design, and the research required to be your own advocate, and align your commentary with legal statutes and provisions.

In a nutshell, there is very little time to post anything meaningful, coherent, or even worthy of interest to other people out there. Some of us are spent.

What was the whole point of this rant, you say? Aside from justifying my bad blogger tendencies (as some would say, if your going to leave it idle, remove it), I was reminded today that sometimes, you need to make that time.

I ran across a blog recently of some parents who like many of us are, very isolated and feeling alone in their daily battle of raising special needs children. They detail what many of us experience on a daily basis, as well as far too often the fallout, and lack of support that we often desperately need. Cue naysayers in 1, 2, 3, 4...................

Let me just make this bold assertion of my opinion, and be quite clear about what I don't want to hear. We may seem negative. We may seem as though we are complaining about what we were handed with these special needs children, and all that entails. We are often lost, and tired. We often have no support available for us to keep from hitting the lowest of lows. We do have small victories, and joys with regard to our children; we often miss them because we are beyond stressed, and over worked. We do not always voice those joys, because often people look down on us for thinking something so small was worthy of noting (the classic double edged sword we face daily).

I find this behavior in general irritating, and it keeps me away from blogging as well. I will say though, until you've lived it, you really have no legitimate opinion to express.

So whereas I may not become a regular blogger from this point forward, I do realize the need to try a little harder. Parents like us are the only support system we have out there, and the only people who will truly help us through our darkest days.................